I AM The Ninja :: A Die Antwoord Adventure at Coachella

Yo Ninja – I’m the effin Ninja! For real! This past weekend at Coachella 2010 I deftly embedded myself for over four hours, sans any credentials, and avoided security sweep after security sweep backstage at the Sahara stage to witness Die Antwoord’s first official US show. Could they live up to all the attention they’ve been gathering on the internet and deliver a real experience that fans, and new listeners alike, could make sense of (is it comedy, entertainment or music) and take home with them? I had to know. Oh yeah, plus, I love them!

But let me jump to before all that. There are some things you know you must do. Experiences that are very different from things you “could” do. Like when you’re climbing around on a boulder and you “could” jump from one to another, but you don’t “have” to, so you don’t. Seeing Die Antwoord backstage, a band I would call one of my most-favorite, and attempting to meet them was something I knew I “must” do. There’s no way I could miss first hand an event that just might go down in music history. A history I was responsible for witnessing.

Slipping past crew around 6:40 to catch my pal Bassnectar’s set (“I AM A LASER” on his latest album Cozza Frenzy is a collaboration between us) I was now on the playing field of my intentions. Start cool conversations, make friends, and look like you belong fast is the way I began to assimilate my presence there. Bassnectar’s set came and went, he destroyed it btw, and now I was alone. “Okay here I go,” I said to myself, as I prepared to stay in a place I could have easily been ejected from in a moments notice through the following sets of Kaskade, David Guetta, and Z-trip.

Over the course of those acts there were so many times due to exhaustion that I was ready to just walk out of there and just say; “fuck it –I don’t care,” but winners never quit. My feet ached, I was dehydrated and every half an hour or so there was a security patrol that rolled through shining a mini mag light on people’s wrist bands –the one I didn’t have. I had my eyes open for that. Every time I saw them start to check, I would just causally walk to another less populated side of the backstage. Have attitude, purpose and be chill and I think you can slip into anywhere. At three hours into this I was okay with the idea of getting tossed out of the backstage area but somehow I made it to the main attraction.

About twenty minutes before their set, Die Antwoord arrived backstage. The people I had fallen in love with on the Internet were real! Walking just with a handful of crew towards the green room, Ninja’s gaze was focused. Eyes straight ahead, he was not about to be distracted, there was a prize to claim. Following them back to the artists area, I saw Ninja start to warm up by pacing back and forth in long strides, whipping up his performance chi to deliver. Talk about a high pressure gig –this was the text book definition of that. His concentration reminded my of what I have seen in film of prize fighters like Muhammad Ali getting ready to deliver championship blows in the ring. Several fans tried to start conversations, but Ninja had to quickly cut that off and retreat even further to get his wits about him.

With a security escort now called over, him and his team of Yo-landi Vi$$er and DJ Hi-Tek, who was definitely not the DJ Hi-Tek you see in all the videos and photos (?), made their way to the side of the massive Sahara stage staircase. By this time I was like a ghost and able to float wherever I needed to. As they walked by me, I just slipped right into their train and arrived at the foot of those stairs –the gateway to Die Antwoord’s next career level.

My video posted here shows you what goes on next. After a brief sound check and a Yo-Landi Vi$$er theme-track the group performed “Enter the Ninja, “Wat Pomp” and “Beat Boy.” In this serious amount of fan footage I took you will see that the energy was so intense and the pressure so steep that it took fake DJ-Hi Tek three times (!!!) to land the intro to “Enter the Ninja” A very fucking close call there and almost embarrassing.

So many people wanted to meet them. Hi profile fans, bloggers, and other musicians were alongside me staring up at the group that had tapped their inner Zef and brought it state side. But when they were done, their security escort took them right past everyone and back to the green room. No handshakes, autographs or gushing fan photo ops were gonna go down. Bummer dude, though I thoroughly understand. The Die Antwoord crew had just delivered the money shot and they had to be spent. Making sense of what had just been given on stage by them would take time and right then they needed to buzz on their own terms.

I waited a little while to see if there might be an opportunity just to say thanks. I observed Ninja wander about the backstage grounds and eventually pause to look out between the mesh covered chain link fence to a festival he could not attend. At that moment I felt sorry for him and other high-profile musicians, there was no way this victory was going to be shared. To have to be secluded from the very people who make you a star is a painful paradox to observe. I decided to split and go find my crew. I had my story to tell and I left with the hope that when the moment is right I’ll have a drink with Ninja and shoot the shit someday. Thanks Ninja, Yo-Landi and fake DJ Hi-Tek, I saw history go down like no one else. I was the fucking ninja that night.

Story Photo (unauthorized) by: www.losanjealous.com

If you live in the Los Angeles area, catch Die Antwoord with M.I.A. and host of other great acts at HARD LA July 17th, 2010